The heart headband

That’s the kind of friend I am. I’ll hold it back while you are sweating balls in hot yoga. I’ll hold it back while you fly down Bush St. on your skateboard. I’ll even hold it back while you scrub the grime off the bathtub in your new apartment. I’m not like those other friends, the ones that’ll only hold it back while you’re puking up Alize and champagne. I’m better.

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